Mum sits in a trio of her friends, husbands long gone. Mary is dismayed at the lateness of the late but for, once, I am not impatient. How did I know that? Once upon a time separation brought me closer to my children and it has done what it does for Mum and me today. Pat is dead, we are alive, we are glad we have each other.

Grief, trauma and life transition companion. It is the mysterious, spiritual dimension of grief that harbors the capacity to go on living until we, too, die. The face of loss has many different features and is complex and varies for everyone.

Choose not a life of imitation. December came and I flew off to NYC with some friends the week before Christmas! My life was on.