Thursday, July 8, 2010. I search for words that will not sting. A memory in time that is not bitter. Why is my soul so despairing? My life has not ended, its beginning. Why do I not, grasp this gift? Learn to live an honest existence. Settle down have a few kids,. Get that white picket fence and. Oh wait, I had all that,. I let it go for alcohol and pills. I lived vicariously through others. Allowed them to abuse me,.

Saturday, August 14, 2010. As tired bodies lay to rest. To dream of mystic lands. And let your imagination expand. Showing us things that could be. And memories of the past. And the hopes of our heart. For a glimpse of time, these are ours. To see in delight and horror. Until the distant waking hour. But when we wake from slumber. Gone for a time, perhaps forever. Nothing, is as it seems.

Friday, August 13, 2010. When I was A child. When I lay in bed at night. Visions of little people came into sight. They were so real to me. In my memories they will always be. The fireplace had hot coals glowing. Outside the cold wind would be blowing. I could see them in the firelight. They never seemed to give me fright. They resembled little gnomes and elves.

Monday, July 26, 2010. Just call me a fallen idealist. Right now I just think; pass me that drink so I can get pissed. And forget all these worries. I tried so hard to defeat what I felt inside. And these feelings are getting harder to hide. Friday, July 23, 2010.